On being a b*tch-we all are. Every Goddess is a b*tch. It is a part of us-we just cannot help it. Remember when you feel this way and think that whatever you are being b*tchy about seems really real-it may just be the inner b*tch flaring up and saying “HEAR ME”. “EXPRESS ME.”
She needs to be expressed and that’s ok. She is an important part of us-she protects us and keeps us from getting walked all over or from taking care of others ALL the time. Like a petulant child who declares,with all sincerity, “I hate you!” she also declares such bold feelings of dislike and riteousness for others. However, while we usually remember that the child really is just angry and does not hate us, we frequently forget the the b*tch is also just demanding for a feeling to be heard-not speaking great truths.
Take what she says as an indicator of unexpressed feelings or un-nurtured aspects of self-not as the the truth.
Bless My Inner B*itch-And yours too!
Today I realized that we are all like babies.
When my son was a newborn, I remember planning a morning out. First we’d dash to the grocery store, pop by Target, swing over to the dry cleaners and then stop at the drug store on the way home. I’d set out with my new baby, his 500 pound car seat, his newborn temperament and inevitably about half way through my list at the grocery store (my first stop), I’d dash to the checkout lane, figure my husband would have to pick up the rest and then go home. Either he was fussy or tired or hungry. Target was not a stop but the actual activity that would take up our whole morning. A day was not about accomplishing a long list of to do items but hopefully getting through one item completely without too much spit up on my shirt.
I am on day 3 of my detox diet and I feel the same as my new baby did. I just can’t be out too long. I either need a snack or a rest or just to get out of the public eye. I look ahead to my new life with lapband and think it will be the same or even more so. I am told it will take me 30 minutes just to get down 1/2 cup of food. I’m going to have to get up earlier to do that in the morning.
So I think, what else is our life about? I mean, did Goddess really put me here to see how many errands I could knock out in a morning or to see how I could learn to be so present to the Goddess in me and my family and friends to take the time that is needed for our nourishment, nurturing and survival. Can you imagine a cave person saying that there was no time to cook food for the hearth because “I am just too busy-this leather won’t tan itself! Plus I have to gather berries and repair everyone’s clothes-we’ll just throw together something or get drive thru at the cave up the hill?” Nothing is more important that the care and feeding of ourselves and our families.
So, I am trying to see myself as a newborn, learning to live in a body and be loved and love. How to survive and thrive. I invite, beg, implore and plead my goddess sisters to do the same. Love yourselves-Goddess is in you, love her there first instead of last.